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Saturday, October 4, 2014

Oreos: 30 Days of Random

I'm just going to pop this here, because not only does it satisfy my Oreo post, but also my Yoga pants post. The image quality is crap, but I couldn't figure out the html to imbed the tweet, so we all have to get freaked out momentarily as we realize it is not the focus of our eyes that is the problem, but rather the image quality that I've included.


I like Oreos.  I now only eat oreos when there are extras in the oreo bag as I'm making lunches for the kids.  Sometimes Oreos break or crumble, and Quality Control (me) rejects those Oreos when packing lunches for the kid.  Like the Egg-dic-ator in "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory", the little needle points to bad, and the Oreo falls not onto the tray for the Oompa Loompas to polish and wrap, but into the garbage chute.  And by garbage chute I mean, of course, my mouth.  I eat them.  The broken ones. 


You would not BELIEVE how many broken Oreos some packages contain...after I'm done with them. Or possibly you would.

There are, I judge, three main ways to eat Oreos. 

1)  Skim the cream off the black cookie with your teeth.  Eat this.  Then eat the cookies.
2)  Skim the cream off the black cookie with your teeth.  Eat this.  Discard the cookies.
3)  Eat the cookie with the cream in it.

When I was a boy I foolishly followed the first path.  That left me with the creamless cookie to eat (my least favorite part).  Had I been a wastrel I'd have discarded the cookies, because nobody really likes them, but that seemed frivolous...what were we, the Rockefellers, that we could just discard creamless cookies pell-mell?  No.  We were not. 

As I've aged I realized that the combination of both the cream AND the cookie together is what makes Oreos truly delicious, the melding of the two flavors in harmony.  And as long as you have a portion of the Oreo that ratio of cookie to cream remains constant and perfect.  Like an element, when you break it into tinier bits the pieces remain unchanged, just smaller...so too with an Oreo.  And so I eat them whole. And by that I mean only the broken ones.  The broken ones I eat whole.

4 comments:

  1. I actually like the dark chocolate cookie better without the cream filling. I am probably a mutant, though.

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  2. So funny! I just view the inside of the oreo as a necessary evil standing in my way of enjoying the cookie!I have passed this on to my daughter, but we are considering trying the reeses ones...I've heard good things!

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  3. Kermommy I think I am truly the mutant - I don't like the greasy feeling on the top of my mouth the filling leaves behind so I don't really eat them at all.

    Haagen Dazs peanut butter and chocolate ice cream is an entirely different matter... ;-)

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  4. I eat *most* of the icing off first, leaving just a film on the choc cookie, and then eat the cookie. I prefer the cookie to the icing... that first bit of eating icing is really just to get it out of the way and not having any better option. ;-)

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